Living With a FOMO Mentality
By Lainie Chait
When I was 19 in the early 90’s, all my friends were losing their shit (in a good way) at the parties that were starting in the doof scene. These parties were going off!
Boy George, Pat Benatar and Duran Duran were starting to move off the radio waves and trance music and music festivals were taking over the attention of thousands of hungry twenty somethings. It was an incredible time to be alive visually, sexually and audibly. There was recreational substances that were being experimented with on every street corner and our generation was going to ensure that we had a taste of it all. Back in those days the quality of the substances was of a much better quality so we were much luckier than the present day where quality seems to be a thing of the past and greed is more important than the safety of the consumer.
For myself, well…I started off at these doofs and would have loved to have been at more but instead, back in the early 90’s, I was taken in to a doctor’s office and told that I would never be able to drink again, have late nights or get off the medication that they were about to put me on to prevent the epileptic seizures that my brain started to have occasionally. When I first showed symptoms of having an electrically compromised brain, before I even knew it was compromised or even heard of the word epilepsy, I was living with a personality that never wanted to miss out on ANYTHING. If there was ever anything going on socially, I needed to be there!! Even if there wasn’t anything going on socially, I’d invent something and gather people together so that there miraculously WAS a party happening.
My star sign is a Gemini and I have been told that I am 100% aligned with the personality traits of the twin sign. Two sides to my personality, the socialite who is always up for fun, adventure and communicating whether it be man or beast and then at any moment the other personality can kick in which is restless, indecisive and juggling a side order of feeling “caged in” so I make plans to exit the situation, sometimes with no warning to my nearest and dearest who are left wondering ‘where did that bloody woman go now’?!
In general, living with a socialite, extrovert kind of personality is exciting but extremely exhausting because you feel in the depths of your being that you have to be everywhere and anywhere and always ON! I have loved it though, it suited me perfectly to be like this but it didn’t quite suit the Epilepsy so when I was diagnosed and handed the news that I would have to reign in my party ways because of my compromised brain I was put in a situation where I felt like it was the FOMO or the Epilepsy that had to go. I thought about it for a while and came to the conclusion at 19 that it was the Epilepsy that had to bugger off. See ya, don’t want you in my life, what even is Epilepsy, whatever? I’ll just keep on being everywhere and anywhere and I’ll deal with the consequences of my choices in the morning.
In saying this, not every time I decided to go to a party or social event when I was in my twenties and thirties and drink or indulge in recreational drugs did it end in a Grand Mal aka tonic clonic seizure in the morning, but the “threat” was always there for my brain to decide if it was going to jack-knife on me because I had deprived it of way too much oxygen the night before.
This sort of personality now has an Acronym called FOMO (fear of missing out) attached to it and I am still kind of under its spell. I am 45 now and not seduced by every social event like I used to be but still, the FOMO call has its seductive arms wrapped around my vulnerable and easily swayed psyche.
Having lived with a seizure condition for 26 years now, I can never really say that I have full confidence in what my brain will do at any given time as it is an electrical organ which relies on so many factors in order for it to work properly, but I have way more confidence in myself and invest an incredible amount of personal responsibility in my decisions including how I educate people around me so that if my wiring was to go a bit cray cray I would at least be in good hands.
So if you like to go out more than your body would like, or simply want to be more conscious about balancing a social lifestyle, then you should consider using some of these awesome products so you can feel great when you’re having fun and the next day when your body is recovering
- What Hangover – Herbal capsules used for prevention and treatment of hangovers. Contains Milk Thistle and Dandelion root extracts. Will make your liver have to work a lot less
- Vibes – Boost your good vibes with these 100% herbal capsules with Guarana for alert, focused energy, and Mucuna for uplifted & balanced mood. Great for physical labour ,studying and of course partying!!!
- AphrodiTea – AphrodiTea is a wonderful herbal alternative to social use of alcohol and pharmaceutical libido enhancers. Designed to create a happy mood
- Love Bubble – Uplifts the mood, opens the heart, relaxes the body, calms the mind, brings feelings of love, bliss and happiness. Socially, partying, dancing, deep intimate connections, social events, mood elevation, cuddles and fun.
- PLENTY OF WATER
- Rescue Remedy Plus (for the next day) – A unique combination of the classic English Bach Flower ‘Rescue Remedy’ and the Australian Bush Flower Essence equivalent, ‘Emergency Essence’. Invaluable to have handy in times of stress, inbalance or injury.
- Mellow Yellow (nothing compares to it for taking just before you sleep) – Alcohol-free liquid extract of california poppy. Sedating, quite strong. Verrry relaxing! Highly recommended with a massage, or as an alternative to alcohol.
- RevivaTea to lift you back up the next day – The best way to support your body before and after you party! This herbal extract contains a new and improved formula of herbs traditionally known for their liver and kidney supporting properties.
- Gotu Kola Spagyric – Documented as being useful to support improving memory and intelligence, vitalising brain & body
So as far as the FOMO personality for me these days, I still go out, that will never change, but my decisions where to go out and what I do when I’m out are based very much on a few key factors which help me and might help you too with your own FOMO:
1) Always make sure that if you need to extract yourself and lie down there will be a space for you to do this. Very important to honour when you are exhausted and give yourself time to recoup.
2) Make sure you are with people who have your back and respect your decisions to take time out. I have been in many situations were peer group pressure kept me up and awake a lot longer than my brain or body could handle and I suffered largely for it the next day.
3) Clear the morning calendar! For me this is essential because my seizures 99% of the time happen in the morning when I wake up. If I had gone out the night before and I wake up and my brain isn’t wiring so well then I have no pressure to be anywhere or do anything.
4) Know when enough is enough and don’t keep indulging or staying out later if you can feel that you’re tired. JUST PULL THE PIN AND GO HOME! I call this a move to self-love!
In summary, when other people wanted to put limitations on what I could do out of their own fears for me, I rebelled and got trashed. When I got to know myself and put my own limitations on myself that were right for me I could accept everything so much easier and I enjoyed going out more as I had a more mature approach to when to pull the pin and take myself home!